I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
