This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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