idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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