dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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