READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize