i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
