gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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