For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
