Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
