Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
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i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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