drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
