I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Randomize
