I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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