just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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