We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Randomize
