She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
We need to get me chipped asap
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
