I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
