hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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