I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
the raccoons are back...
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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