you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I'm always down for nudity.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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