well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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