So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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