no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
