Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
