Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
