Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
