and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
