I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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