We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Ladies don't puke and tell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize