You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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