She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize