Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
