Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
