I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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