We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.