im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
That reminds me...we need to get swords
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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