u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
