Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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