I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
