I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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