So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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