I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
its not stalking. its research.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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