If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
