no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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