At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
