God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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