The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
