the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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