her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
