glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
