We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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