i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
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